Many Moroccans Hide Their Loneliness Behind Smiles at Family Gatherings
Surrounded by family and present at meals and celebrations, some Moroccans nevertheless feel alone. A report based on fifty interviews in Morocco describes a pain that is hard to admit, because it seems incompatible with the image of a society where people are always surrounded by others.
“You have a family, food on the table and a roof over your head. What more do you want?” This reaction, recounted by one interviewee, sums up the obstacle faced by those who try to talk about their loneliness. After trying once, some prefer to stay silent.
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The report by the Annecy Behavioral Science Lab, on social ties in Morocco, is part of a study conducted in eight countries. Researchers carried out interviews lasting two to three hours. Their work explores the experiences of fifty adults; it does not measure the proportion of Moroccans affected by loneliness.
In these accounts, loved ones are very much present. They provide financial help, lend a hand, offer a place to stay and share meals. But several participants struggle to confide what is troubling them. Some fear worrying their parents; others anticipate being misunderstood or judged. One participant says she tells her sister what she hides from her parents.
An older man says he feels like a ghost in his own family. People ask how his health is, then everyone goes back to their phones or to conversations he can no longer follow.
The fear of seeming ungrateful
Admitting that you feel lonely can also invite a hurtful question: don’t you have any friends? Several interviewees associate this admission with shame or failure. For some men, the fear of appearing weak reinforces their silence.
Family gatherings can then become a quiet ordeal. One participant says he smiles when people look at him, while counting the minutes until he can leave the room. His presence is enough to keep up appearances.
Others eventually leave messages unanswered. One person describes waiting until they are in a better mood to reply, then letting the conversation die. The guilt that follows pushes them even further away from loved ones.
The report also captures moments when this withdrawal stops. One participant calls a friend without saying she feels lonely: they talk about cooking or podcasts, and then laughter returns. Another finds comfort in a brief call with her sister or sharing tea with a neighbor.
